Woman Who Spent Two Weeks in Europe Starts Every Story With “When I Lived in Europe…”

Sandy Sanchez, the Indiana native who skyrocketed to a certain level of fame in her local circle after living a solid fortnight in Europe, graciously offered to share some of her “profound” European insights.

“Ah, France,” she sighs, her eyes misting over as she recalls her three-hour layover at the Charles de Gaulle airport. “I lived there too, you know. The aura of the place just seeps into you. The ambiance of the terminal, the joie de vivre in the duty-free shop – it was transformative.”

It seems there isn’t a city, town, or even a rest stop in all of Europe that didn’t leave an indelible mark on Sandy during her epic two-week voyage. Her friends, meanwhile, have begun to keep a tally of how many times she’s referenced her brief, but evidently life-changing, European sojourn during casual conversation.

“Her record’s currently six times during a lunch break,” reported one co-worker, Sarah, who was growing slightly weary of hearing about the ‘undeniable charisma of the Berlin kebab stand guy’. “Sandy even started using the metric system out of nowhere. I think she’s forgotten we live in Indiana, not Inch-kilometer-diana.”

However, not everyone finds Sandy’s newfound European identity tiresome. Her enthusiasm has inspired her book club to start reading a broader range of European authors – even though Sandy’s exposure to European literature was limited to a quick browse through a Madrid airport bookstore.

But it’s not just literary pursuits where Sandy’s “European enlightenment” shows. At the grocery store, she frequently tells anyone within earshot about how different the produce was ‘across the pond’, now favoring overpriced imported cheeses over good ol’ American cheddar.

“She even tried to convince me that the crows here in Indiana are ‘nothing compared to the ravens of the Tower of London,'” chuckled a befuddled neighbor. “We don’t even have ravens here, Sandy!”

While many are skeptical of Sandy’s claims of international savvy, one thing is clear: this isn’t the same woman who left for Europe two weeks ago. Sandy has metamorphosed into a veritable Europhile, capable of recounting a personalized anecdote about every European landmark, however fleetingly she experienced them.

For the foreseeable future, it appears that Sandy’s friends, family, coworkers, and random passersby in the supermarket will just have to endure tales of her illustrious European ‘residency.’ We can only hope that her passion wanes before she embarks on her next trip, lest we have to hear about ‘When she lived in Asia…’

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